I hate it when people channel surf. I mean I seriously want to go on a murderous rampage and murder people who havent even been born into your family if you channel surf while a show is on. I will fucking rip your heart out and choke you with it. I will probably fucking attack and rip and tear and maim and dominate. Throw someone down a flight of steps after a swift kick to the cranium. Curbstomp their dog and kick their mom. (I could go on, I got a whole damn list.)
I don't really have rage issues. I just can't help that little tiny things get under my skin sometimes and irritate me to the point that I need to get out of the room or I will do something rash and stupid and I am not a teenager anymore, I can be arrested.
So now I will go the fuck outside and scream at some trees.
AN HOUR AND A HALF LATER:
Due to the recent hormonal squall, I grabbed my camera, and abandoned ship and I went and petted some horses. After I stood at the fenceline for about an hour trying to garner some attention, since I really have no idea how to speak to horses, especially ones that only understand Pennsyvania Dutch, I stood there and said HEEEEEERRRE HORSIES! *tsk tsk* WHATCHA DOIN HORSIES AAAAW COME ON PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEE! HelllloooOOOOOOO *little kid hip sway dance* I WANT TO PEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTT YOOOOOOOOUUU. I AM THE HORSIE WHISPERERERERERIE!!!!!! *horse neigh noise I learned in kindergarten* MY LITTLE PONY MY LITTLE PONY WEEEEEEEE
That doesn't work.
So I stood there and blabbered and took some photos and then they all finally decided as a herd that I was interesting and mobbed over.
Some interesting points of my visit with my equine comrades were:
I couldn't find the video of the Vomelette that I wanted to post, so we must all do without. I am way more disappointed than anyone. 'Cept maybe Natalie.
Also, I just jumped because I thought a piece of grass on the floor was a monster spider and I spook like a horse (hah) when it sees a mouse or whatever the hell it is that spooks them besides say, baby dragons or the ghost of Anne Boleyn or something.
Also, I am a big pussy. | posted by Whatsername again....? @ 5/25/2006 08:03:00 pm |
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I don't really have rage issues. I just can't help that little tiny things get under my skin sometimes and irritate me to the point that I need to get out of the room or I will do something rash and stupid and I am not a teenager anymore, I can be arrested.
So now I will go the fuck outside and scream at some trees.
AN HOUR AND A HALF LATER:
Due to the recent hormonal squall, I grabbed my camera, and abandoned ship and I went and petted some horses. After I stood at the fenceline for about an hour trying to garner some attention, since I really have no idea how to speak to horses, especially ones that only understand Pennsyvania Dutch, I stood there and said HEEEEEERRRE HORSIES! *tsk tsk* WHATCHA DOIN HORSIES AAAAW COME ON PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEE! HelllloooOOOOOOO *little kid hip sway dance* I WANT TO PEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTT YOOOOOOOOUUU. I AM THE HORSIE WHISPERERERERERIE!!!!!! *horse neigh noise I learned in kindergarten* MY LITTLE PONY MY LITTLE PONY WEEEEEEEE
That doesn't work.
So I stood there and blabbered and took some photos and then they all finally decided as a herd that I was interesting and mobbed over.
Some interesting points of my visit with my equine comrades were:
- Watching mommy horse fart directly in baby horse's face, as it was unfortunately right by her bootyhole.
- The Clydesdale that stood staring at me and then decided to drop a boner. Exactly what I needed to see to may my day complete.
- Being downwind of half a dozen farting machines. DAYUM.
- Next time I think I will bring them some of the apples that my dad doesn't eat because it is nice to spoil other people's work animals.
I couldn't find the video of the Vomelette that I wanted to post, so we must all do without. I am way more disappointed than anyone. 'Cept maybe Natalie.
Also, I just jumped because I thought a piece of grass on the floor was a monster spider and I spook like a horse (hah) when it sees a mouse or whatever the hell it is that spooks them besides say, baby dragons or the ghost of Anne Boleyn or something.
Also, I am a big pussy. | posted by Whatsername again....? @ 5/25/2006 08:03:00 pm |
